you know i should really include those number trackers thing on my blog, so i'll know the volume of human (or maybe not-human) traffic into my blog. reason being if there's only a handful reading then i can post more stuff.. okay, doesn't seem to flow right? and i know my reason is going to sound oxymoronic, but seriously although a blog is a public entity on the net, one still expects some sort of privacy.

it's like this really, if you want to keep people off your blog then you'll just write it in your private journal instead. the thing about my idea of a blog is that i do want people do read, but the question is,

who?

just like in marketing there's a target segment you focus on to market your product to. similiarly with the content in this blog, there's also a target - obviously not any tom, dick and harry. i do like to let people know, and have that freedom to choose when to click on 'azaria's blog' on their favourites (if i am on their favourites list) whenever they want, to know what's going on in my life, my thoughts, my happenings.

on a school note, i think i'm really not cut out for lab. chem lab is literally suffocating, with the many odd smelling chemicals, spillages, and then you find out that this chemical is toxic, that is carcinogenic... but the main issue is i really suck at lab, half the time i do not know what i'm doing, what i'm pouring into what, how to set up the apparatus, wash with acetone or water (ya i know it's either organic or inorganic, but sometimes the chemical names confuse people!), when to pour in, method of filtration. i just feel so grossly inadequate in the lab... read up, yes i will. but beyond that i think i can grasp theory better than pour this here, pour that there. i really don't like chemicals!

it's 1st sep! officially teachers' day, definitely keeping cindy tay in mind. you're a real gem mrs tay/ cindy/ pinkiecow, and to you i'm lost for words 'cos you're just such an amazing person and teacher.

and speaking about labs, i know it's silly to mention here but i'm really grateful for her little scientific advice here and there, this one lab tech called charlene. amidst my terribly lost and confused chaotic scene in my head during labs, she never fails to say something or help me a wee bit somehow.

going along the lines of it's the little things people do that touches you. this would be true.. so even if i were to look back at 4 years of being a terrible student in the labs, at least i'll think of that nice lab tech who made it more bearable.

didn't go back to ij this year, as you probably realised, had lab.. it's officially from 930 to 330, a solid 6 hours. but stayed till around 430 today, which is still probably the least compared to the rest - since i came pretty late (11 i think). whilst going to school i kept on thinking of, 'oh no i need someone to help me place the glasswear in the oven!' cos you need to 'bake' it for an hour to get rid of all the moisture. thankfully charlene did it... if not, ahaa, there's no way i'll finish my lab today.

sg today was fine, but i think a bit stoned from inhaling all the chemicals in the lab. i can't help but think i can do more for the group (i really don't know why i'm blogging about this, but no i'm not targeting this at anyone, i love my groupmates so it's more of a personal rant). the idealistic me wishes i could focus at one thing at a particular period, but the reality is that there are other things boggling in my head. so i'll have to be content with focusing on one thing at one time and pushing the rest out of my head in those moments.