the special sem module allocation is out today, and i didn't exactly get what i wanted - biz finance. actually i didn't expect to get it, so it wasn't a huge disappointed if you're wondering, the problem now is i'm deciding whether i should drop the mod i got.

which is intro to american lit. the course instructor is apparently quite demanding, and you've got to write 4 essays for the exams. i've been so rusty with essay writing, and haven't done any practical criticism in ages. the main point is this:

i don't know whether i'm up to it.

and i sure don't want to waste taking this module and getting a lousy grade, because i couldn't find my old muse. maybe i've lost it, whatever flair i used to have in lit.

and it seems that if i don't take it, i'm chickening out of something i might potentially really enjoy. despite having to read a heck load during that month plus.

now whenever i think of a module to take, it has to be whether i can score, that's primary, and the secondary factor would be whether it interest me. yea i know it sounds wrong, go ahead and say 'you should take things you are interested!' or 'if you're interested in something you will score'. so yes, i'm not that brave, i think of my big dream at the end of the tunnel, and i won't do anything to ruin it. not even a small little module...

sigh, sometimes i wonder why we have to make choices. honestly, life was so much easier in primary school, when you didn't have to choose your subjects. you just took whatever was offered to you, and pretty gladly i might say. i don't recall asking why i was studying all the subjects, it just came naturally to me. so yea, maybe i want to have a little less freedom, so that i don't have to bear the pain of deciding.

i shan't continue, lest someone thinks i have really lost it.