an ode to a dear friend

i think i might have travelled too far, and forgotten a friend.

you used to be all that mattered, the friend whose only number i could remember.

but i don't know if fate played a fool on us, figuratively, because i don't believe in fate.

when you were seeking, i didn't respond,

when i was seeking, you didn't respond.

of all the hurt, of all the pain, of all we've gone through.

was i all along decieving myself that i've moved on?

that i don't seem to know you anymore?

how much apologies, how many sorries to be said,

would all not suffice.

i don't know if i said this before, but here is it,

i am sorry for all i've done,

for leaving you out there in the cold,

for not trying to understand when i should,

for being so caught up in trying to move on

for everything that went wrong.