fuck everything and everyone

crazy, irate, mad me

i'm not going to make sense, so don't read if you think i'm gonna piss you off

notice there's no fullstops? shows i'm really gonna rant

you know when bad things come, they have to come all at once, so imagine them being legs of people purposely stuck out to trip you

yep, they not only trip you once, twice but three times or even four

it doesn't matter if you fall flat on your face

life still goes on traffic still moves never ceasingly virtually the entire world wouldn't even know you're feeling down

guess this is a factor that drives people to suicide

you could just disappear from the face of this earth and people wouldn't give 2 hoots

halt there

in case you think i'm contemplating suicide, i'm not.

why?

cos the answer's staring right at you - there will still be people that do care about you

and i have a faith which i firmly believe in

back to the main point: fuck everything and everyone

i'll correct myself

fuck almost everything and not everyone

cos the former would make me seem like a little sad bitch

maybe i am, but it was never in my wildest intentions to be one. what i've written i've written, i'm not going to be like most blog users in this post, filtering out whatever they deem to be unfit; because what they wrote might have a negative impact on some particular people reading their blog. for this entry, i don't care and don't want to anyway... this is just an outlet for me to rant, shout, holler like a mad prick. majority of the reason has to be academic, feeling seriously shortchanged in terms of grades and the amount i have up in my gray matter. i know what went wrong for those 2 tests, esp math, i guess i'm a person who looks more on the result. if you're giving me that funny look now, don't, cos i can't help it. it irritates me when i study for something and get not what i desire. i don't negate all the extenuating factors that might have compromised my grade, i don't, cos what people see is your damn result, and that's what i focus on.

so yes, if i had to choose a period where i'm at my all-time academic low, it has to be now. and guess what? the A levels is the damn bloody exam that matters the most. i'm not going to screw up the 2 subs i screwed up during Os. i don't intend to fall flat on my face pursuing the profession i so want to go into.

even if it's His way of telling me i'm not meant for it. at least let me apply and get rejected with stellar grades, not lousy grades that do not allow me to choose what i want to take.

i shouldn't be online, i should have had a nice warm shower, but no, when things are going bad for you, people like your little sis has to annoy you by using the shower at that time. of all times, she has to use the shower when I come home. guess it's like what pris said, even small little things that don't usually annoy you that much usually, can really rub salt to your already wounded self.