why is it when i think i'm over you that i begin to think i'm not? yes, it's been quite some time and yet you still have a place in my heart. is it meant to be? are you meant to still occupy a sizable place in my heart? i can't believe it... on phone call from a friend about you and my heart beats a little faster than it should. sheesh... and you give me butterflies in my stomach, make me all so excited about your new 'hairdo'. i know i can move on... in fact, i've been moving on quite well..... i just can't help thinking all those years of liking you without you knowing... it's all for naught. in the end, you don't even know all the crap i did for you, how head over heels i felt for you, etc, etc, etc, etc... maybe i'm just mad at myself for not telling you that night and getting it out of my chest. get a definitive answer even i knew what it was already to be 100% sure. i have no idea why the sudden urge to write this down... i just felt like it.

yes, i'm over you, i'd like to believe i am. though i still like you a lil bit somehow... but that doesn't matter... i think i'm just angry that i wasted so much for you and on you and you didn't even know and you won't ever know.

for better or for worst i guess? someone told me that it was better if i didn't let you know. that someone's your friend... maybe it's meant to be.