flawed....

i will not mention anything too specific here. it was meant to be kept under wraps and it shall continue to be that way until you get over ac. well, you have always written about how you feel knowing i'll read it, how about me? i know it's hard and all, i might not be able to place myself in your shoes all the time but i'm only human.

your a much stronger person than me, emotionally (i feel). it might not be true to you, but that's what i think. i admit i shouldn't be writing all these because i should not in the first place. but my feelings are getting the better of me and i just want to let it all out. it is starting to irritate me, your behaviour, everything. i really can accept the fact that you like ac and am willing to continue to be your friend but it's starting to bug me when you seem not to want to friend me anymore. to outsiders, i know this sounds childish, this entry is only meant for one intended audience, if you don't get what i'm writing, it doesn't concern you, so ya.

sending emails and all, i don't think it really helped. i know i can't do much, i'm only one person, you do need two hands to clap. all i want to say is, emotionally it takes time but it (being close again as friends) can never happen if you yourself don't want to speed up the process, because by the time you do, i'm afraid, the other party has turned cold. not saying that i'm mean or not willing to wait, but sometimes, i know only too well that time drifts friendships away, no matter how much you disagree, this is what i believe is true. even if i wanted to wait, you would also have to play your part in trying.

if you don't get what i'm writing, call me. i'll be waiting.... trust me on that